If I learned anything during the nine and a half years it took me to complete my PhD, it was that completing the PhD was not about being smart enough to complete it, but about being persistent enough not to give up (and crazy enough to pursue it in the first place!). As a first-generation college student, I remember being proud to be pursuing a bachelor’s degree – something neither my parents, grandparents or other family members in previous generations had attained. At the time, I did not think that I would go back to school and end up with a master’s degree let alone a PhD. And what I discovered during my academic journey was not what I expected. I found that the key piece to my persistence and completion was my “Why?” Why was I pursuing a PhD? Why did it matter to me to finish? These were important questions for me to reflect on because my responses drove me forward, particularly during those times when I just wanted to give up – when I didn’t want to read another book or article, when I didn’t want to write another word, when I didn’t want to transcribe another interview or analyze even more data. Whenever I felt like throwing in the towel, I reminded myself of my “Why?”
My “Why?” actually had nothing to do with making my family proud or being the first in my family to ever complete a PhD. As a woman of color, I expected my PhD to open doors that might not open up to me otherwise. As a wife and mother, I expected my PhD to expose me to opportunities that would in turn allow me to provide my family with financial stability and abundance. As a Filipina American who rarely saw people that looked like me with PhD’s or in visible leadership positions, I expected my PhD to pave the way for those who looked like me to know that if I could do it, they could do it too.